2014-05 Bozeman

The first day of Spring is upon us, the date when Montanans respectfully ask the Deity to refrain from 2-foot snow dumps until September next. The plea is often ignored. But last week as the east coast was enduring another horrific 6-inch snowmageddon, I sat on the balcony enjoying 60+ degree sunshine. We used to blame the Soviet Union for weather manipulation…someone should check Vlad’s intentions thereabouts.

And I just looked out the window. It’s snowing…

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The Crimean situation has got me to thinking…Idaho has a funny shape and is largely populated by a quirky citizenry. I wonder if a movement to annex might gather some steam (Montanaho?) I plan to ask around. If it works, watch out Wyoming.

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Work on the Paris apartment is apparently proceeding apace, and thus my next geographical transition may be in the works. I am however pixelated by an issue that may visit upon me some significant challenge.

Several weeks ago as I exited the 46 bus I was shocked to see a 4-foot x 3-foot poster in the bus shelter sporting a picture of the Duck Dynasty foursome in full camouflage announcing (in French, of course) the imminent arrival of the series to French TV (no Fox News, but Duck Commander. Go figure).

I may be called upon to explain this phenomenon, as I was 3+ decades ago when I first breached Gaullic shores to be greeted by “Vous êtes américain? Ah oui. Chicago, Al Capone, bang-bang.”

I was hard pressed to explain why I did not have a six-shooter strapped to my hip and queried whether I planned to commit mayhem during my stay. The canard crowd’s introduction to France may well release a new demand for explanation of bizarre North American behavior. Wasn’t easy then and won’t be now.

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MH370 consumes us and illustrates our intolerance of the unknown. The demand for instant clarification (if not gratification) spawns a genuine scramble for illumination. “We just don’t have a clue” doesn’t cut it in a post-NSA environment. Just as we were getting initiated to a “government knows everything” mentality, we must now grapple with a Sargent Schultz (I know nothing) mindset.

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It will, of course, be deemed mean-spirited that I recall the current Administration’s 2009 attempt to “mend international fences”, confronting a planet disdainful of the USA that had allegedly reached a high point reminiscent of the dark days of the Vietnam war. I do wonder if there is a country out there that now has an improved view of Uncle Sam. International BLOG recipients, feel free to chime in.

In that vein, as Uncle Sam transitioned over the last century to Uncle Sugar, a dichotomy persists. On the one hand we are the overbearing, meddling, policeman-of-the planet, while on the other the world seems perplexed when we don’t rush in where they all fear to tread.

It appears that our current President now shares a less than illustrious trait with his predecessor: he can do no right.

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I am beginning to question the wisdom of 3 months in the cradle of gastronomy. I returned from the City of Light with a “baguette belly” that has persisted as deep snow and howling winds have thwarted thrice weekly slogs. But my accommodation in Paris is situated on a wide boulevard with a central pedestrian area that diminishes (but does not eliminate) the possibility of collision with mechanized conveyances.

I am impressed with the number of joggers nowadays on the streets of Paris. Decades ago anyone running was deemed to be a lawbreaker fleeing a scene of carnage or pillage. Now there are even jogging groups in the city, though populated mostly by Scandinavians and North Americans. And the elderly are still inclined to stare at fully clothed streakers.

Bientot...

2014-04 Paris

Two days ago all the English-speaking channels on the apartment TV expired mysteriously, a particularly cruel occurrence as it coincided with the secession of sunshine and the onset of cold drizzle.

But being forced to watch local programming has certainly improved my French.

I was particularly absorbed by an film featuring the ubiquitous aircraft in danger plot where lots of people died (including the cockpit crew)…someone’s Air Force thought about shooting the plane down but decided not to…a flight attendant was groped by sinister character (I thought at first he was trying to highjack the plane but apparently was interested only in touchy-feely)…and the plane, a 747, was landed perfectly by a housewife from Cleveland who was met on the jet way by her daughter who announced she had been accepted at the Sorbonne, or perhaps it was Mt. Holyoke. I like happy endings.

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Now deposed Ukraine President Yanukovych joins Mr. Snowden as a guest of Mr. Putin. Interesting company. And at the moment things are heating up and world leaders are exchanging threats and warnings. Another red line perhaps?

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Last BLOG I commented on the singular nature of Cartesian logic applied by the French (“I am Mickey!”), but it is established fact that the French are masters of multitasking, at least when they want to be. Reminds me of the Month Python dirge

I like traffic lights

I like traffic lights

I like traffic lights

But only when they’re green

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The Barack & Francois show, in full swing as I left home shores 2 weeks ago, was a virtual love fest, calling each other by first names and joking together as they walked. A witticism making the rounds here in France is that “at least now each has one friend on the planet.”

But even as Hollande traverses France trumpeting “Yes We Can” in English (a phrase not heard inside American shores since it resounded so powerfully over 4 years ago yet lost much of its oomph when reality set in), the two world leaders share both philosophy and reality.

Both have faced the stark reality that kvetching from the outside is infinitely more challenging than leading from the inside. In America, certain media (i.e. Fox) have taken to playing side-by-side clips of Senator Obama then and President Obama now.

The contrast is stunning, with the young Senator crucifying the sitting president for trifling with the Constitution in a way that appears incredibly tepid in comparison to his current “pen and phone” line of attack. In 2008 “I am a constitutional scholar and I respect the Constitution and I will not trample it as it is now being defiled.” Oh well, times change.

And in France, the man elected on a hardline Socialist ticket that (among other things) vowed a 100% income tax on those making over $1 million Euros, is causing left-wing apoplexy by cozying up to the business community and proposing measures to make France “more business-friendly.” I suspect the 77% drop in foreign investment last year has helped to focus the Socialist mind.

It seems that “yes we can” has morphed into “gee it seems a bit more complicated than I imagined.”

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Next post will be from the New World...bientot