Saturday, June 27, 2009

2009-18 GEORGETOWN

Call me cruel and heartless, but I am disturbed by the magnitude and breadth of the grief expressed over the untimely passing of Michael Jackson. While any such unfortunate event should be met with solemnity and condolence, the event was not in my mind of the cataclysmic proportions to which media, Congress with its moment of silence, The White House, the clogged Internet, and various social organizations propelled it. I can well imagine MTV in mourning, but when CNBC suspended reporting on the global economic crisis to run full-time helicopter coverage of crowds gathered outside the UCLA Medical Center, I sensed a cosmic imbalance.

This was a man who proclaimed on worldwide TV that sharing his bed with young boys was “an act of love,” (I bet it was!), and who avoided jail time by offering multi-million dollar settlements to the parents of children in his care. His claims to fame included dangling his infant child off the balcony of a German hotel and cosmetic surgery that even his own mother once commented was “strange.” Yes, he could dance backwards, and perhaps that tells us something about the culture we have become.

He was labeled the “king of pop.” In my day that appellation fell to Dr. Pepper.

Poor Farah Fawcett’s departure was scheduled for the same day, and as such her considerable talent, including a seminal performance as an abused wife in The Burning Bed was sorely eclipsed in news reporting. For the limited coverage she did receive, the media, always with a sharp eye to the relative importance of events, focused almost entirely on her pinup and Charlie’s Angles days, while her dramatic achievements were left nearly unmentioned.

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It has been remarked with some justification that I can claim no natural affinity to the merchant trade, for reasons among others that I do not believe that anyone, least of all the customer, is always right. When the visiting attorney (I knew he was before he so announced for all to hear) whose credit card was declined while attempting to buy train tickets, demanded an immediate audience with our corporate attorney and our “software engineer,” then grabbed a telephone from the hands of my young associate, I was ready to call 911, but dutiful employee that I am I referred him to my manager. There ensued nearly 15 minutes of harangue during which he refused to move from the head of the ticket line, rendering all subsequent sales impossible.

At one point a bearded mountain man several steps back in line offered to “take him out” in return for a free train ride, then relenting said, “aw hell, I’ll pay for the train, just let me take him out.” Temptation was never so compelling as when in 4th grade Sandy Smith offered to “show me hers,” if I would “show her mine.”

Turns out his card was invalid as the night before his credit card company had been sold and a new card expressed to his home in Pennsylvania. My revenge came in the form of a delightful phone conversation (sad that I could hear only his side) with a third-world citizen explaining the new rules of the game. The counselor must have uttered (with increasing volume) a dozen times “I’m in Colorado for crisssakes, what good is a card mailed to my Pennsylvania home going to do me here?” Clearly the Indian sub-continent customer service rep on the other end was not well schooled in North American geography. Salvaged my day.

It is abundantly true that 1% of customers deliver 99% of all grief, and while I am highly motivated to return the favor several fold, my employee handbook instructs, contrary to biblical teaching, that I must suffer fools gladly.

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There are myriad locations on the planet where the locals are fond of saying “if you don’t like the weather, wait 5 minutes.” Out my window in the Paris Marais I once witnessed brilliant sunshine, ominous threatening black clouds, sun, snow showers, then a return to brilliant sun, all within the course of une demi-heure.

It is certainly that way in Clear Creek County, Colorado. Yesterday as dark clouds rolled down the valley and the skies opened with fury, a customer was outraged that I was required to levy a cancellation fee for the train ride 40 minutes hence to which he would in no way subject his fragile family unit. Parroting the official company policy that we “operate rain or shine,” I tried to ease the tension by commenting that “by departure time the sun will probably re-emerge.” Face contorted with self-righteous rage he flung back “that’s bull****, I bet you $100 there won’t be any sun for the rest of the day.” I mumbled something about having my gambling problem under control, then beat a hasty retreat from his wrath.

Sure enough by boarding time sun glasses covered the eyes of one and all, and I positioned myself strategically as passengers alighted at the end of the ride, but I couldn’t make eye contact with the gambler as his attention was suddenly focused elsewhere.

It’s what one does to derive simple percs while working for modest wages. As when delivering phone books last year, on occasion I remarked to those inclined to refuse the free book, that buried in its pages was a “secret passage” which, if discovered, qualified the finder for entrance into a drawing for a free ride on the Space Shuttle. Believe it or don’t, it was the tipping point for several acceptances. And in truth my manager did once comment on a bizarre phone inquiry she received as to the exact page in the book containing the coupon for the free space ride.

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Well, an entire Post devoid of reference to politics! Disappointment for a few perhaps, but relief I suspect to the many. You get what you pay for. The Adventure ambles along the plains even as the anticipation of a mountainous storm season emerges…..
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Saturday, June 20, 2009

2009-17 GEORGETOWN

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Mea culpa. Maybe.

Chrysler’s sale to Fiat is accomplished in record time in part through a redefinition of bankruptcy law that has stood for some 200 years. My President promised, and I doubted, dazzling velocity in navigating a process that historically has required many months and even years. Illustrative of the unprecedented stroke the White House currently wields, unparalleled speed ensued, and even a plea to the Supreme Court (albeit that it fell fortuitously to its most liberal member) could not derail the freight train of Obama destiny. Of course those standing on the tracks as the train barreled past got mowed down, but what’s a little carnage in the name of progress.

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A reader has questioned my use of the term “my President” and occasionally “our President.” Well, he is! The terminology is in part a rejoinder to the throngs of the past who petulantly proclaimed “Bush is not my President.” That only works if you void and mail in your Passport to the Department of State. Remember the hordes who vowed to emigrate to Canada in 2004? I saw neither a mass exodus then nor a rush to return four years later.

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Good leftists have a talent for never letting a tragedy pass unexploited. Left wing BLOGS are aflutter with cries of right wing hate, after the Holocaust Museum shooting and the murder of Robert Tiller. Right wing hate crimes? Certainly they exist. Similar acts of violence on the left? Yeah, they subsist as well. Remember Lee Harvey Oswald? Recall the ELF and PETA slash and burn tactics to further their “causes?”

A continuing theme of this BLOG has been that those on either side of the political spectrum who believe they have cornered the market on decency and morality, and conversely those on the other have a monopoly on hate and violence, perpetuate a cruel hoax and provide useful data on how their synapses fire.

Of course Hollywood does this every day to the delight of the far left. Frank Burns, the bumbling MASH surgeon, Rose Nylan, the dipsy mid-Western Golden Girl, and of course, Archie Bunker, Republicans all. While liberals Hawkeye, Maude, the West Wing guy, proliferate and prosper. Just Hollywood’s way of using the appellation to proclaim someone to be insensitive, morally repulsive, or genetically deficient. How easy to mark someone as a dolt (or worse) simply by applying a label.

Academia is not far behind. Recall the Duke University philosophy professor when asked why there are not more conservatives in the profession, responded that they lack the intellectual capacity to engage in such eclectic endeavors. And when was the last time you heard of a left-wing speaker being pummeled with fruit and driven from the podium at one of our citadels of “free and open discussion?” Happens to conservatives with regularity.

Now if this leads to a self-satisfied smirk and a poke in the ribs of your far left cohorts – “see, I knew it was true,” then you join a robust band of those who also believe(d) in the superiority of one culture over others. Those folks in Germany who were convinced of the inferiority of the Jews, racists in the American south and elsewhere who treated people of color as chattel, homophobes everywhere who label gay men as limp-wristed pansies and Lesbians as testosterone-laden tomboys. There are vivid descriptions for those who harbor such beliefs.

Paranoid, you say? Perhaps. But name one Hollywood hero of the last quarter century portrayed on the screen or tube as a proud conservative? John Wayne is out of fashion. You might point to the Terminator or the idiot Steven Segal, but movie moguls fashion them as brutish, knuckle-dragging trogs, all the more mockable by the sophisticated Chardonnay set.

Leftists are simply so unfailingly convinced of their superiority that they cannot fathom alternate philosophies and beliefs. The closed mind is a terrible thing to let roam loose.

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During the Campaign, McCain advisor Senator Phil Graham made a seminal statement to the effect that America and American’s were not as bad off as they made it seem, and suggested in most un-PC terms that they “stop whining.” He was beset with anguished wails “oh how can you be so cruel when the country and its citizenry are in such pain.” Personally I thought he made sense. While there was (and remains) suffering for sure, on a relative scale it was either exceedingly moderate or our threshold of acceptance dipped lower than the Dow Jones average.

No, I am not going into competition with Oprah, but I do offer a novel for the exercise of measuring our pain against that of contemporaries. The Monkey House by John Fullerton, a journalist who reported the Bosnian war from Sarajevo, paints a stark but realistic picture of the siege of that city. Read it and tell me if you believe any American would trade their pain for that experienced in this once glorious city of the former Yugoslavia.

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I’m not a fan of the slippery slope theory. When the NRA suggests that taking members’ AK-47s is but a precursor to feel-good liberals confiscating children’s BB guns, I have difficulty connecting the dots. When liberals vow that 12-year old girls should have unobstructed right to abortion without parents’ consent lest this precious “human right!” begin to crumble, I am similarly flummoxed. But piercing (not piercing commentary, but body piercing), which for decades was confined to ears (a benign practice yet one I fail to comprehend) has now expanded to eyelashes, navels, tongues (ugh), not to mention body parts that were once considered private and unassailable to the needle.

Establishing one’s unique identity is often put forth as a rationale for such bizarre behavior. I don’t recall ever feeling the need to so self-identify (at least not in such extreme fashion) and that may explain some of the deficiencies under which I struggle.

But piercing?

Early on I had a bad experience with a needle at the hands of a rural doctor (or so I was told; I don’t recall seeing a diploma on the wall). And that may account for the aversion. But why anyone would voluntarily stick a bolt through their tongue or mangle a body part designed for suckling infants is, I’m afraid, a practice that no matter how I try, I can neither fathom nor justify. Fogey though I be, I am not in favor of breaking skin for pleasure.

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Both Atlantic and Pacific Basins remain tranquil, but the response trade is rumbling awake, and I am receiving inquiries as to my quickness (as opposed to my deadness) and availability if and when…
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Wednesday, June 10, 2009

2009-16 GEORGETOWN

I am comforted that the world has paused for a few seconds to remember D-Day, and the contribution of British, American, and Canadian forces toward the liberation of Europe. Recent history has recorded the glee which much of the planet derives from dumping on America, so it’s nice to remember the day in which sacrifice was rewarded with gratitude.

Much has been made of the weather surrounding the Normandy landing (not an “invasion” as some describe, as it was a military effort to retake occupied territory). But history has forgotten the contribution of my namesake and uncle, Major Harry Richard Seiwell, assigned to the Allied Command General Staff. As one of the planet’s first PhD Oceanographers, it was his advice that helped convince General Eisenhower, despite nasty weather, to proceed with the mission.

While a majority of consultants sued for delay, chief meteorologist British Group Captain J. M. Stagg, with urging from Major Seiwell, argued for the mission to proceed. Seiwell maintained that it was not the weather itself, but its effect on the sea and ultimately on the amphibious aircraft that was the critical factor. It was Major Seiwell’s analysis of weather’s impact on Channel swells that provided the clinching data.

Captain Stagg garnered a place in history, while Major Seiwell quietly returned to his family and research at the Woods Hole Oceanographic Institute in Massachusetts. Several years later, along with his wife and two young daughters, all were killed instantly while on a skiing vacation in Quebec, when in a blinding snowstorm their car was broadsided by a Canadian National Railway freight train at an unmarked crossing. The engineer was alleged in local news accounts to be speeding while intoxicated but was not charged.

Major Seiwell was a bright branch on a family tree that includes many undistinguished limbs, but few miscreants and no (identified) ax murders.

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Are we entering the age of Sarkobama? Perhaps. But in the joint press conference I watched on C-SPAN, my President was 98.4% in the spotlight and a pensive Sarko sat quietly, nodding occasionally, and appearing as though he wished he were somewhere else. There is always a risk when you share the stage with a rock star that your own light will rest unseen under the proverbial bushel. Not a promising prospect for any politician.

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Don’t hold your breath in anticipation of an outcome for the 2 journalists held by Pyongyang to replicate the happy ending afforded the young woman held in Tehran. While Iran is still hopeful of winning some international support (and maintains friends in Russia and China), North Korea appears willing to go down in flames, and thus has little incentive to make conciliatory gestures. The lesson should be that when a bully sticks a finger in your eye, doing nothing (or posturing with meaningless threats) is not a good omen for your other eye.

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A word on who does and does not pay income tax. Dueling BLOGS left and right make a hash of the subject, both employing convoluted math and logic to spin their predetermined convictions. And so we turn to the IRS, which states that in 2005, the last year they bothered to compile the figures, 43.8 million tax returns – 32.6% of the total filed, paid no income tax. Statistical projection places that number well over 40% for the year 2008, and Obama’s promises to “reform” the tax code, if realized, will certainly push that number over the half century mark.

And so each of you reading this who actually pay U. S. income taxes must realize that the burden you feel as you slog along the trail of life is the weight of a non-paying American you carry. Now that might illicit some comfort if you picture the slogee as a Simon Legreesque, handlebar moustache sporting, black hat wearing evil businessman, but I will venture there are readers among you of quite modest means who bear a tax burden year in and out, while somehow half of the citizenry escapes the ignominy of April 15.

You might deduce from this statistic that fully half of America is so bereft of recourses that they are unable to share, even in small measure, in the tax burden. Either that or perhaps we have crafted a tax code that in the nation with the highest standard of living in the history of the planet, fully half the citizenry can rely on the other half to foot the bill.

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I don’t consider myself a particularly moralistic person, but I’m troubled by the “enlightened” view that illicit sex is a victimless crime, that intimate relations are nobody’s business but the participants. As a conservative I don’t fancy government functionaries poking their noses into the nation’s bedrooms. But I was disturbed by my former President’s dalliance in The People’s House (I’ll stop bringing this up when leftists cease the “Bush stole the 2000 election” refrain). What he and whatshername engaged in matters not one whit to me, save the lesson it sent to the nation and particularly our young.

When I hear that some schools and social organizations are promoting oral sex to young teenage girls as a convenient means of avoiding pregnancy, I wonder whether the path we travel is paved with shifting sand. Where oh where are the feminists on this? For years they have attacked all manner of chauvinism from men’s magazines to workplace harassment, yet I hear nary a word about such advice imparted to impressionable young women.

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I think I mentioned that I have but 28 channels on my TV, equally divided among Spanish language, religion, community feel-good, sports and the Boob Channel, a collection of top-heavy flaxen lovelies toiling assiduously to confirm every demeaning slur against their sub-culture. It arrives on my TV a bit grey and fuzzy, as though some celestial censor is attempting to shield me from depravity.

But there is AMC with its bewildering array of offerings. I’ve never been one for macho movies nor chick flicks – I’m simply not a movie aficionado. But on this cold, rainy morning I watched the syrupy A Kiss at Midnight and experienced an odd sensation, akin to sentimentality, which I also felt at age 8 when Zippy my pet goldfish expired. Just one more slide on the slippery slope toward dementia, I suppose. I then watched A Thousand Clowns with Jason Robards and Barbara Harris and The Longest Day, produced I would assume as an audio/visual aid for those with the shortest memories.

…Tourists have descended on Georgetown, swelling the town’s population. I’ve always wondered at the local proclivity to condemn the very population that supports them, yet I do notice that those who travel for pleasure often forget to pack their common sense and good manners. The Adventure is swept along with the roiling Clear Creek, emboldened by Continental Divide runoff. A-Basin, the last area ski resort holdout, closes today…the seasons turn, turn, turn…And by the way, the snow shower last Sunday was brief and followed by bright sun…
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Thursday, June 4, 2009

2009-15 GEORGETOWN

Today is one which in winter would be glorious. Steady precip, creating a wonderland of snowfall, perfect for a walk through town or a stroll in the woods. But now that the Vernal Equinox is upon us, an identical weather pattern produces biting cold rain that encapsulates the bones and an ominous fog that hangs over the valley housing Georgetown. A good day to BLOG.

And in a rare example of harmonious geophysical alignment, on this cheerless day the Georgetown Loop Railroad is out of commission, as 18-hours ago a sizable boulder tumbled down and into one of the open cars filled with enthusiastic riders contemplating nothing more aggressive than a cloudy chill replacing springtime sun. The car did not derail, no injuries resulted, but the rock made further passage impossible, and a second train was hurriedly dispatched to transfer passengers and return them to the station where they received full refunds. I found them surprisingly tolerant of the inconvenience. One German lad sitting in the very car struck by the chute de pierre labeled the occurrence the high point of his visit to America. One wonders as to his worst experience!

The Georgetown Loop Railroad features open gondolas and “covered” cars, i.e. roof but no side cover. I am amazed at the hearty souls who brave the elements – wind, drizzle, mid 40’s temperature – to glimpse a bygone era. Yesterday I took my mandatory familiarization ride and mine tour in “partly cloudy” conditions. By nature I avoid tours of any stripe, but did enjoy this one. Traveling through narrow passages cut into steep terrain, crossing (4 times) Clear Creek (near the height of its ferocity propelled by Continental Divide runoff), viewing the odd bighorn sheep, traversing the High Bridge, a narrow trestle several hundred feet above a steep canyon long ago named Devil’s Gate. The guide was informative and mercifully un-hokey. All in all a good day.

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I have some sympathy for Ms. Sotomayor, as every syllable she has uttered since puberty is now under a microscope. Don’t know about you, but I would certainly wither under such scrutiny. Both sides of the aisle play the gotcha game and both shriek in righteous indignation when the other side employs the tactic.

Is she qualified? Undoubtedly! But so was Robert Bork. Unquestionably. Though his judicial philosophy was unacceptable to the left. No less so than her remarks suggesting Latina women are more intelligent than white men are offensive to the right (and to other political philosophies, one would hope). And the Choice folks are twitching, as our President apparently neglected to inquire as to her abortion stance (exceeding hard to believe), and a little-reported factoid is that her ascendancy would mean a two-thirds Roman Catholic majority on the Court. That would mean that over half of all Catholics serving in the history of the High Court are currently sitting. Can you imagine the pressure on our President when the next vacancy occurs to appoint a Jew, a Muslim (Sunni, Shiite?), GLBT, et. al.

And I may have to ramp up my predictive tendencies. Despite much speculation as to the eventual nominee, it appeared to me a slam-dunk that the twin actualities of gender and ethnicity made Ms. Sotomayor an odds-on favorite.

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A troubling thought as Iran moves toward elections next month. It is plausible that its power structure, specifically its President, who honed his political skills in the “takeover” (a PC term favored by the media that actually means “terrorist siege”) of the American Embassy in Tehran some 3 decades ago, is actively baiting Israel to launch a pre-emptive attack. Unlike those of the last century, when troops massing on Israel’s borders provided clear evidence of impending danger (and thus some limited international sympathy), it seems that Iran may have a nuclear strike capability long before definitive proof can be laid before the United Nations, which in any event would posture and dither and issue empty warnings (Saddam was issued 19 “final” warnings as I recall).

This poses a true dilemma for America and illustrates an enduring geopolitical quandary – talk vs. action. It is clear that much of the planet, led by Europe, favors the former while the USA labels empty rhetoric as hypocrisy and charges headlong into the tall grass and nettles to varying world opinion: WWII, hero; Iraq, goat.

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And yes, as Ronald Reagan would say, “here they go again.” North Korea fires missiles. The UN Security Council scurries into Executive Session and hastily crafts a “severe response”. Result: North Korea launches more missiles and abrogates the 1953 Armistice. The planetary geopolitical geniuses certainly have the little dictator shivering in his boots, don’t they now?

And just this morning an “unnamed” White House source suggested that our President may have to “go it alone” if repeated UN warnings are unheeded. Say what? Could that be? Who was that other guy savagely vilified by having the temerity to “go it alone” when 19 UN “final warnings” failed to deter the Butcher of Baghdad?

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I have long believed that were some interplanetary voyagers to alight on our shores and request treatises describing all the major geopolitical "isms" practiced on earth – after study and contemplation they would likely embrace some form of communism or socialism. It sounds so good; but it does not work.

Today I arose hours before sunrise to hear my President address the Muslim world from Cairo. He sounds so good; I hope his words ring true. So far we have only the promise. But it is promise confronting centuries of history that tell a different story. Many will say that promise trumps its antonym. But promise sans fulfillment rings hollow and breeds false expectation. One can (and should) always hope, but the cynic in me urges caution. One indisputable fact remains however; our President has mastered speech as the French have conquered cuisine.

….Hurricane season is upon us, and the tragedy of Air France 447 reminds us that M. Nature is a formidable mistress…
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