Thursday, August 8, 2013

2013-18 Albuquerque



I am this week in “Albuquirky,” so named by the residents of Santa Fe in the grossly misbegotten belief that they, and not world surrounding them, are the true arbiters of truth and light. I will be here 3 out of 4 weeks this month, taking a class then teaching a class then presenting at the State annual DHS Conference.  Whoopie!

 
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We are outraged (inraged as well)! On the eve of Albuquerque’s annual balloon festival, France (France!) has claimed to have wrested from us the one hour balloon launch record (345) by setting off 408 on the occasion of their Fete de Balloon.
 

What? The French? What do they know about balloons? OK, there was that Montgolfier fella, but that was over 100 years ago. I smell something poisson-esque. Perhaps they were counting une, deux, trois, huit. In any event, come our festival October 5, locals vow to blanket the sky with canvas, perhaps to prove we have more hot air than the French, which would be quite a feat. Vive la balloon!
 

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I am certain there are those who would rise in indignation to dispute this assertion, but I do believe that Santa Fe is the “doo-dad” capital of the planet. Virtually every summer weekend the historic Plaza is roped off to vehicular traffic and replaced with stalls, there have to be 500+, merchandising a dazzling array of bric-a-brac, mostly jewelry and painting, all “in the tradition of the west,” which to me translates as gaudy.


And in the shade of the adobe overhang along East Palace, seated on the ground, wares spread before them on blankets, rest indigenous peoples hawking baubles at one third the price of identical merchandise displayed in the air-conditioned shops a block away.


Hawking may be a misnomer. In general they appear uninspired by the commerce they undertake, and mid-afternoon often finds them dozing until a tourist attired in blinding shades of chartreuse and fuchsia arouses them with an inquiry into price. I find the scene depressing, a stark reminder that despite the Government expenditure of billions designed to improve their lot, we have largely failed.


And I cannot traverse East Palace without grinding my teeth at the transformation of address 109 from the ancestral home of the Manhattan Project into a garish emporium of gewgaws, gimcracks, and thingumajigs.
 

Those who have not yet heeded my counsel should proceed post-haste to their local library or used book shop (or Amazon for the couch potatoes among you) to acquire “109 East Palace” by Jennet Conant. Even the pacifists among you should appreciate this comprehensive account of the birth of the bomb.


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I wonder what Santa Fe will be like when winter drives away the tourists and replaces them with ski bums? I am already starting to dither upon whether to reacquaint with my skis, although the $50 “old fogy” season pass is a temptation (when I was age 58, essentially free skiing was common for those 60 and above. As my age progressed so did the threshold, but I have finally caught up.)
 

A long-ago acquaintance and ski patrol team lead abruptly abandoned the sport at 70, saying the voices get louder and the fall and bounce at 20 gets you a free ride in a sled at 70. True. And even the exercise of caution, at which I show scant competence, does not protect against the buzzed (at 10am!) 250 pound out-of-control wingnut wreaking havoc on the slopes.  Stay tuned.

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